EVER WONDER WHY SANTA NEEDS TO CHECK ALL THOSE LISTS TWICE?
YOU MUST LOVE THE HOLIDAYS
STAY OFF THE CAPTAIN'S NAUGHTY LIST
NOW EXPLAIN TO SANTA WHAT WE MEAN WHEN WE SAY PONY.
SCREW THESE RESOLUTIONS I'M BASICALLY PERFECT
HE GOT INTO THE EGG NOG AGAIN
YOU'RE DEFINITELY ON THE NAUGHTLY LIST
A LITTLE DRAMA HAS ALWAYS BEEN PART OF THE HOLIDAYS
FROM ONE ATHEIST TO ANOTHER
HOPE SANTA FILLS YOUR STOCKING WITH WEED
HOPE THE TURKEY'S STUFFED
YOUR FAMILY ALREADY KNOWS YOU'RE GAY
CHILDREN MAKE THE HOLIDAYS MAGICAL
KEEP IT SIMPLE KEEP IT MERRY
MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL...EVEN THE LOSER AND THE HATERS
SANTA KNOWS WHO YOU VOTED FOR